英语四级14分作文范文批改2

　　英语四级待批改作文：
　　When it comes to the problems of psychological health, people in growing numbers are beginning to realize that many disease originate from it.

The reasons for this phenomenon are various. Firstly, some people have lost the skill of direct contact and get alienated from others, they can not manage interpersonal relations. Secondly, employment pressure lead to mental confusion of people , they wish to find hope of life , but they are lost. Finally, love of their family are not usually considered important , they do not get warm in the shadow of sorrow.

There is no denying that further attention must be paid to the problems of mental health. In the first place, people should face the realistic society and other persons. And they have to do anything in open-minded, only in this way can they keep moving under huge pressure. Furthermore, they need to find psychological doctor if they could not be self-control. In a word, we are moving mountains long before we know we could.

　　作文批改如下：
　　When it comes to the problems of psychological health, people in growing numbers are beginning to realize that many disease（加s） originate from（用词不当）it.

The reasons for this phenomenon are various. Firstly, some people have lost the skill of direct contact（改为communication ）and get （改为got）alienated from others, they can not manage interpersonal relations. Secondly, employment pressure lead（加s） to mental confusion of people , they wish to find hope of life , but they are lost（有语病）. Finally, love of（改为from） their family are not usually considered important(表达有误), they do not（改为can’t）get warm in the shadow of sorrow.

There is no denying that further attention must be paid to the problems of mental health. In the first place, people should face the realistic society and other persons（删除）. And they have to do anything in open-minded（改为with an open mind）, only in this way can they keep moving under huge pressure. Furthermore, they need to find(改为ask) psychological doctor if they could not be self-control(改为control themselves). In a word, we are moving mountains long before we know we could.（表达有误）

　　同学你好，要提高你的表达能力，另外要注意前后时态保持一致。