英语四级2分作文范文批改1

英语四级待批改作文：
　　This chart vividly described that the consumers of cell phones have increasd,from1999 to 2005. In 1999,there are 200 nunmber of people. In 2002,the consumers have changed more than 400 number of people. To 2005,the number of consumers have less than 1000 number of people.
　　How to account for this situation? there are a great number of things. Firstly, more and more people want to communicate each other. Secondly, with the increased of economics ,cell phones become greatly significant. Thirdly, cell phones have changed apart of life .people depends on it. Surely ,there are even more element.
　　To my opinion ,this phenomena accumulate cell phones have become more than significant. More and more people realize that cell phones is necessary and cell phones have changed the style of people's life. Yet, the consumers depends on cell phones and cell phones influence people.

　作文批改如下：
　　This chart vividly described that the consumers of cell phones have(删除) increasd（拼写错误，改为increased）,（删除逗号）from1999 to 2005. In 1999,there are（改为were） 200 nunmber of(删除) people（加Using it）. In 2002, the consumers have changed more than 400 number of people(改为the number of consumers changed to more than 400). To(改为In) 2005, the number of consumers have less than 1000 number of people.（改为was near to 1000）
　　How to (改为what reasons)account for this situation? there are a great number of things（改为factors）. Firstly, more and more people want to communicate each other. Secondly, with the increased(改为increase) of economics(改为economy) ,cell phones become greatly significant. Thirdly, cell phones have changed apart of life(改为people’s life) .people depends on it. Surely,there are even more element.(删除)
　　To（改为In） my opinion ,this phenomena(改为phenomenon) accumulate cell phones have become more than significant（一句话里不能有两个谓语动词）. More and more people realize that cell phones is（改为are） necessary and cell phones have changed the style of people's life(改为people’s lifestyle). Yet, the consumers depends on cell phones and cell phones influence people(同上，一句话中不能有两个谓语动词)

　　同学你好，你的英语基础比较薄弱，建议你多背一些满分作文。第二段是让你分析原因，不是让你讲手机的好处。